Thursday, July 25, 2013

My story of Awakening...

This is really funny. I typed this title and I almost burst out laughing. There are all these stories of Awakening. I started this post thinking others might want to know. I'm thinking now of how I used to really want to identify with the person who was telling their awakening story. Am I like them? Did I have some similar experience to them that might tell me I'm on the right path? I think these ideas are perfectly find, they're just silly mind musings and there's nothing wrong with that. Just like this opening paragraph!

Moving on, the truth is that if I just titled this "My story of Awakening..." and went into this body's life story, you might think that somehow you need to have something similar happen to YOU. Then as you are going through Your journey, you will be constantly comparing yourself with a compilation of stories that you have heard about. I say this because "I" did this.

I think this should be followed up by a question, something that you should ask "yourself" whenever you read something or hear something, (anything, it doesn't have to be on the subject of Enlightenment), ask "yourself" is this from the Ultimate, the Source. Don't just ask your mind, ask the Infinite YOU. If what I am saying in this blog is of the Source, then you will know and you will not have to really know my story or try to find some kind of proof that I am experiencing this. Which also leads me to say that it doesn't matter what group or method you assign yourself to, because awareness just IS. Whatever path "you" walk to get there, does not matter. So if you say "I don't believe in this...or I only follow these types of teachers." It doesn't matter at all. In the end, it really is how honest "you are with yourself." Which is something that no teacher, guru, path, belief, religion, is going to do for you.

Also, if everyone's story or path was the same, it would not be such an exciting world!

Resting in Being

The initial recognition cannot be forgotten. Recognizing what you are not, causes the rest to fall away and leave what you are. The I AM presence suddenly shines through. Then everything starts falling away. I fluctuate between times of deepening and stagnation. I have entered a time when more is falling away and pure conscious awareness continues to rise within.
It's difficult to truly explain because when you recognize that this cannot be resolved within the mind, you recognize that there is no way to properly describe it. Many "teachers/guides" who whatever they choose to call themselves, like to consider words sign posts, but they certainly are not substitutes for simply feeling the life within and recognizing it as the true self.
Recently I have been going within to really catch every single thing that rises within. Whether it is a "good" feeling or a "negative" feeling I watch it with presence. There's an interesting non-reactive nature when watching or listening to something with pure presence. When relaxing into this feeling, pure joy will rise up within shortly after. The more we bring this into life, the more it becomes a natural state.
Ultimately, I continue to say this: If you are looking to find this, you must be willing to let the "you" that you believe to be you "die." You have to be willing to let that fall away and give that up, to finally see that there was never a "you" to die and that you are eternal. There's no ego in that, there's no false self when you let it fall away and come to the neutral state. Seeing it within yourself and all things leads to infinite depths of pure peace and joy. It's a beautiful world.
Recently I met with my parents. I love them very much, and I can see the pain and the searching. I could see my old self in them and empathize with the feeling of wanting and seeking wholeness. It is not something you can give to someone else, as much as I wish it was.